Simple tale of simple country folk

Times are so hard for trade hacks, they have been selling intimate details of their tedious lives to whoever will print them.

One such figure, recently promoted to editor of a leading ad fanzine, was apparently so desperate, he sold the story of his wedding to glossy magazine Bride. It turned out to be quite an occasion, for those arriving on the scene.

Among the fascinating revelations is the romantic notion that the scribe is the son of an Italian peasant (pretentious, Luigi?), while the then bride-to-be was “an English country rose born of a military family”.

While most are content with choir and organ for their weddings – he had to have a Soprano from the English National Opera.

“The flowers…”, he continued, “the packed church… the beautiful farmer’s daughter singing “Make me a channel of your peace”… the joyful surprise at seeing the decked out marquee… the superlative food…”

That’s enough, Ed