No mates?A small fee buys you friends

News for all you sad marketers who work too hard to spare time to make any friends.

A new service called Amicus “devoted to the needs of young professionals” is opening its doors.

It is aimed at “high achievers” who have demanding careers and who find it “difficult to organise and fully participate in recreational and social activities and events”. In other words, they are Norman No Mates.

There is no shame in this as the Diary has no friends either, especially after recent offerings on this page, although one does see a lot of the company solicitor these days.

Simply pay 250 and you will be entitled to go skiing, yachting, scuba diving or even to “villa parties”, all with your new Amicus pals.

The organisation is being launched at the International Sportsman Club, High Street Kensington on March 3.

But beware. Amicus will apply “stringent vetting procedures … to provide an environment of integrity and security”. So no one in advertising need apply.

The Diary will be there. Not of course to make new friends: one has so many. Rather to imbibe the atmosphere and take advantage of the “casual smart dress code”.