Not waving but drowning in Coke

Employees of the mighty Coca-Cola have been through a torrid few months of late as a litany of contamination scares, PR gaffes and stock market woes have jolted the soft drink colossus out of its slumber.

However, just when they thought things couldn’t get any worse, alarming news has reached the Diary that the company is resort-ing to drastic measures as it culls 40 per cent of the workforce at its Atlanta headquarters in the US. According to the esteemed Wall Street Journal: “Some people were terminated on Wednesday.” A bit harsh, I hear you say, but for the survivors it was a case of sink or swim as the newspaper went on to report that “others were put into a pool to compete for remaining jobs”.

All of which might make Coke’s new strapline, “Enjoy”, a little hard to swallow.