Heinz way off pitch at pop’s V2000 event

The golden rule for brands communing with today’s yoof – “make sure your involvement is relevant” – was ignored on a grand scale at this month’s V2000 pop festival.

The worst offender award went to Heinz Salad Cream. In a bid to wean the kidz off mayo, the salad creamers pitched a pale yellow inflatable, branded-to-the hilt, dome structure at the event.

Not only did the promotional staff seem to abandon the stall early but a Heinz spokesman wasn’t even aware the brand had a presence at V2000.

Cereal Partners’ brand Golden Grahams fared better by disguising its pitch as an off-the-wall, rave-cum-cheesy lounge affair under “The Followers of Grahams” banner, offering “true enlightenment”. The Diary’s instantaneous vox pop discovered no one knew who Graham was or had any interest in breakfast cereal but they were happy to jiggle around to Tom Jones impersonators and the like.

Only a heady combination of Virgin Radio’s awesome cocktails, Budweiser’s free beer dollars and the almighty punk rock god Joe Strummer kept your intrepid festival Diary’s remnants of sanity intact.