How to win the cup, but still lose the trophy

Fresh from the roaring success of their Golden Jubilee antics, and hot on the heels of the – ooh, we came so close – World Cup, the Evening Standard has something else to shout about. Some of the Standard lads won the Wandsworth five-a-side Summer League.

Despite losing their star player, Danny “golden hairy balls” Mansfield earlier in the season to a broken metatarsal (all the top players are having them, don’t you know?), the Standard clinched the title in its last game, with a winning goal from father-to-be John Lush.

The team took the trophy on a victory tour round several South London pubs, but it was unfortunately left behind in one of them, so the team – pictured in front of the Diary’s Kensington maisonette – hope to repeat their success next year, this time without breaking their balls.

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