Titchmarsh has lent his name to mud

Alan Titchmarsh seems to have been everywhere since time began. In fact, he’s only been around since 1666, when he helped Christopher Wren to lay out the water feature in his plan to rebuild London (it proved highly popular, though why they called it the Thames is anybody’s guess).

So it came as no surprise, when the Diary decided recently it wanted to turn its garden waste into useful fertiliser, that one of the first products it came across was endorsed by the hymn-singing horticulturist.

The Complete Rot composting system, apparently, ensures “no more slime” – ideal when you’re a clean-cut TV presenter. And no – it’s nothing to do with his latest racy novel.