Hark! The husky clockstars sing

Not much to do in Bolton is there? You can watch your football team get relegated (again), look enviously across the Pennines to a better life, or, it seems, work for design agency Clock Creative Communications.

Just as the Diary was despairing of finding anything else sufficiently tasteless to write about, what should arrive but a CD of cleverly adapted Christmas carols? Called Clockstars the Rivals, it features the flattest vowels and the least enthusiastic vocals since Lou Reed sang George Formby (available from all good record shops).

Sums up the world of office Christmas parties, mass-produced corporate Christmas cards and fluorescent tubes as a substitute for daylight perfectly, really.

The Diary wishes you all no cheer and broken presents. ‘Til 2003, then, and as they say: “Oh what fun it was to work with the Clock team every day”.