It really is an urban jungle out there

The Diary is seriously considering taking up residence in Regent’s Park Zoo, to get away from the animals infesting the rest of the capital. Rats, foxes and pigeons it can cope with, but the latest creatures to take to the streets are a different kettle of fish.

First up was a flock of sheep, promoting the fact that Piaggio scooters are exempt from the Congestion Charge. All wool and good, you might think (although the Diary would aver that the only good sheep is a roast one). Sheep car drivers, clever. But a word to the wise: sheep don’t have opposable thumbs, so they can’t ride mopeds. Think on, Piaggio.

An animal with far more digital dexterity is the gorilla (but unlike sheep, you can’t eat them. It’s illegal). Several have been sighted in Docklands, although some of them may have been Piers Morgan. In a clever play on words by Leeds guerrilla (get it?) marketing consultancy Link Communication, they were seen aping human behaviour by handing out leaflets outside the Centaur Youth Marketing Conference last month. They must be bananas. Everyone knows leafletters are paid peanuts.

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