Not-so lucky Luc speaks from his M&S ‘grave’

If former Marks & Spencer executive chairman Luc Vandevelde is looking for a new career following his high-profile departure from the high street behemoth, he could do worse than go into the fortune-telling business.

Take the opening paragraph in the recently released Marks & Spencer Corporate Social Responsibility Report for 2003/04, where Vandevelde prophetically writes: “This has been a challenging year for M&S and many parts of the business are undergoing change as we seek to keep pace in a fast-moving and increasingly competitive market.”

A fast-moving environment indeed, Luc.

By demonstrating such incredible foresight, a Nostradamus-like career beckons, though no doubt Vandevelde will be hoping any further predictions won’t be tinged with such irony.

Then again, considering he is reported to have been paid &£8m in his ‘lacklustre’ four years at M&S, maybe he’ll not have to resort to such methods just yet.

Where’s that crystal ball?

The Diary – being a child of the Eighties – has little regard for the glut of “talent” shows peppered all over the television channels of late. Brought up in the golden era that spawned talents such as A Flock of Seagulls, Sigue Sigue Sputnik and, er…, Milli Vanilli, the Diary sees the likes of Will, Gareth and Darius as little more than fake, plastic and only appealing to the very young.

So the news breaking in California that Mattel’s iconic toy doll Barbie has entered the American Idol competition came as no surprise, as she fills all the criteria perfectly.

Barbie doll’s publicist Ken Sunshine (well, he was hardly going to be an undertaker with a name like that) says: “Barbie’s film career has been successful and she’s ready to show the world her talent for singing.”

Mattel will no doubt be looking to exploit this move. Keep an eye out for the Barbie Betty Ford Rehab Centre, which, if Barbie’s singing career goes to plan, should be available just in time for Christmas.