The pure taste of Ilkley Moor by tap

As Diary’s dad always used to say, before he lost his larynx to limescale, “What do you want that poncey spring water for? There’s plenty in the tap.” It seems at least one company has woken up to this idea: Yorkshire Water has registered its product under the brand name “Icytonic”, and is advertising it as a safe, clean product at the bargain price of less that ha’penny a litre. It’s “best served chilled”, apparently.

But the company won’t have it all its own way for long, though: the Diary hears that Highland Spring’s next ad campaign will feature a woman bathing in the product. And the Guardian is planning a Weekend feature about washing the car with Perrier (apparently, the bubbles are great for fetching dead flies off the headlamps).

And unfortunately, although Yorkshire Water has almost 100 per cent penetration in its home market, it has failed to secure any distribution in the rest of the country. That, as any marketer will tell you, is no way to build a budget brand.

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