Serial lunch-cancellers must

Serial lunch-cancellers must be punished. The Diary found itself stood up three days on the run last week, leaving it alone and hanging forlornly around the office, dressed in its best suit. Guys, if you don’t want us to be your main contact any more, just let us know. At least we won’t be left with empty stomachs and, worse, empty pockets. The unexpected costs incurred to pay for The Diary’s sandwiches and prawn cocktail Walkers crisps on said days totalled &£16.97. So beware, all of you “off sick/in a meeting/something’s come up/we’ve got a massive pitch on – really sorry but I can’t tell you the client, it’s confidential until it appears in the other trade mags” merchants, the Diary is launching a campaign for a sandwich tax – new legislation that will see anyone cancelling lunch with less than 24 hours’ notice pay for their jilted partner’s repast, plus snacks for the rest of the day.