Alarm Belles ring at Drayton Bird as erotic rabbits overrun website

It’s not every day that a leading marketer’s website releases a statement which announces: “We have nothing to do with this company. We’ve never sold bondage kits.” But Drayton Bird Associates was anxious to let it be known last week that it was not an outlet for nipple chains, erotic rabbits or the ever popular Jumbo Jack Man-o-War Black 8″, after its website was hijacked by “purveyors of raunch”, But despite the shock of seeing Drayton Bird’s good name and reputation dragged through the muck after nearly half a century of working in direct marketing and advertising, the website team couldn’t help but comment: “Of course, if a company is in that business, we can most likely boost their sales.” Quite how the site was hijacked by BrazenBelles (whose top-selling item is, intriguingly, a 9v battery) remains a mystery – at least to the Diary. Meanwhile, the marketers at Drayton Bird were working round the clock to clean up their site and return to the more prosaic task of imparting Mr Bird’s many years of marketing knowledge – after satisfying the many orders for nipple clamps, of course.

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