Cementing A very elfy Relationship

The Diary is beginning to doubt its sanity. For the past week or so it has been conducting an e-mail conversation with an elf. And it isn’t any old elf, either.

This one appears to be 342 years old and down on his luck, having been laid off by Santa after Christmas (although he’s still living at Santa’s house).

It all began when a wooden box arrived (mysteriously, at night) on the Diary’s desk. “Aha! Port!” thought the Diary, lushly. But, as you can see, it contained no bottle, but a toy cement mixer and a CV, revealing that the elf (Tony) used to work in the Arndale Centre Co-op.

Oh dear. The pressure of work is telling on the Diary, it seems. If anyone would care to confirm that the Diary still has some of its marbles, try tonytheelf.com. If it exists…


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