No longer saddled with the bit acting parts

It’s long bothered the Diary that it’s always people who get the plum roles on stage and screen. Think Richard Attenborough in Brighton Rock, or Phil Daniels in Quadrophenia. Both shamelessly flaunted their humanity. There have been exceptions of course – Lassie, and Babe the Sheep-Pig, for instance – but they were always few and far between.

Now, however, a company has been set up to rectify this intolerable situation. The Horse Casting Agency exists to supply equine actors for film-shoots, ad campaigns and product launches.

But neigh-sayers should think twice: in Roman times, a horse called Incitatus became a consul, so there is absolutely no reason why such future classics as Fiddler on the Hoof, Singin’ in the Reins and American Piebald shouldn’t be playing in multiplexes imminently. Sing along now for the summer’s blockbuster hit: “Dobbin Hood, Dobbin Hood, being ridden through the glen…”