You really must eat your greens, Ian

The Diary pities poor Union managing director Ian McAteer. Animal lovers have complained to the Advertising Standards Authority about his agency’s “distressing” press and poster ads for local leather settee manufacturer Olympian (MW last week) – they show a baby cow asking plaintive questions such as “Is mummy going to be alright?” and receiving the answer “Don’t worry, they’re making her comfortable”.

However, as well as provoking the enmity of lovers of four-legged friends, he also faces hostility across the dinner table – his wife is a vegetarian. Time for a diet of falafels and lentil soup as penance maybe?